A funeral is a global practice. There might be differences in methods, traditions, or religion, but funerals take place in every part of the world. There are several concepts and practices involved in a funeral, and we know that this can be overwhelming for anyone. If you’ve just lost a loved one and have been trying to wrap your head around all of the issues around a funeral, then we can help. This funeral guide provides 20 questions and answers that you need to know about a funeral.

1. Why hold a funeral?

For thousands of years, people have held funerals to give family and friends a chance to express their love and respect for the deceased. If you recently lost a loved one, a funeral can help you adjust and gain closure by witnessing how much others loved them.

2. Must I respect the funeral wish of a deceased loved one?

First of all, it is important to note that every adult individual has a right to decide what they want to do with their body, even after death. When a loved one has a funeral wish, you must respect it because their interment should follow their religious, traditional, or philosophical beliefs. If a loved one desires a cremation when they pass away, we should have them cremated, regardless of our own misgivings or opinions. The same goes for full body donation to research and so on.

3. How much does a funeral cost?

The cost of a funeral usually depends on the scope of the funeral and what the family can afford. A typical South African funeral can cost anything from R25,000 to R75,000. Some high-end families can go way beyond that mark as well. In the United States, the average funeral costs between $6,500 and $8,000, while an average UK funeral can cost around £5,500. This cost often covers the casket, opening and closing of ground, grave plot, funeral parlour services and embalming, transport, refreshment, etc.

4. Who is a funeral director?

A funeral director is someone who manages everything regarding the funeral, from taking care of the remains to planning and handling funeral details, burial and ceremony. He or she may also offer advice on any legal documentation required

5. What is a cremation and why is it considered?

Just like burials, cremation is a method of disposing of a dead body. It involves burning the entire body to reduce it to its essential elements. Most people around the world recognize the cremation furnace or chamber as the most common method. The process reduces the body to ash using temperatures of up to 1,800 degrees, and the cremains (cremated remains) are then stored in a vase called an urn. Cremation is becoming a popular practice because it is cheaper, simpler and has some roots in many traditions in Asia and other parts of the world

6. Can I witness a loved one’s cremation?

This depends on your wish. If you and other members of your family wish to be present, it is possible. However, most people prefer not to be present and will only take pleasure in keeping the ash for a while until they are ready to bury it, scatter it or plant it into a tree.

7. How long does a cremation take?

The duration depends on how efficiently those handling the process work, from how quickly you obtain the death certificate from the doctor to how soon you can book a cremation session. Typically, the entire process can take as little as a few days to a few weeks.

8. Can I fly with a loved one’s ashes?

As long as you store the ashes or “cremains” in an x-rayable container and check with the airline to confirm whether you can bring them as carry-on or ship them as cargo, you can fly with a loved one’s cremains.

9. What is embalming and why is it necessary?

It is very likely that you or your family would require some time to plan the funeral. This might take days or weeks. To preserve the deceased’s body, embalming must be carried out. It is the use of chemicals to reduce and slow down tissue decomposition to enable viewing at a later date. 

10. Will my loved one’s internal organs be removed during embalming?

Unless an autopsy requires their removal, you do not need to take them out. After all, the chemical injection needs these organs to be effective. Professionals usually treat parts of the body like the head, torso, and stomach separately.

11. Are chemicals used during embalming?

The answer is yes. Experts formulate special chemicals for tissue preservation, including formaldehyde, glutaraldehyde, and methanol.

12. What does a pre-arranged funeral mean?

This is a situation where a person makes much of the necessary plans for their funeral before they pass away. The plan usually spells out the details clearly and sends them to a funeral home prior to death, thereby reducing the burden of the funeral on the surviving family.

13. What is a living funeral?

This is when a funeral service is held in honour of a person who is still alive. Such a person may simply be an aged man or woman who senses that death may just be close or someone suffering from a terminal illness and wants to have one last time with friends and family just to say goodbye.

14. What is a Green Funeral?

This is more of a recent development that seeks alternative ways of disposing a dead body in a way that does not harm the environment. A good example is using a cardboard box or a mushroom suit instead of a coffin, to aid quicker decomposition.

15. Why is an obituary notice important?

The simple essence of an obituary notice is to inform friends and loved ones of the passing of an individual, as well as notify them of funeral arrangements and dates.

16. Should a child attend a funeral service?

While it is important to be observant and sensitive to their needs and how they deal with grief, you should know that it is impossible to shield them from the pain of death. Allowing children attend funerals is not only respectful to them, it might just be a great way to teach them lifelong coping skills.

17. Why are flowers sent?

It is true that flowers are ornamental on gravesites. However, flowers are also very emotional objects. People use them to express feelings of sympathy and love, whether or not they can put those feelings into words. Lilies, Chrysanthemums and Statice are all good examples of flowers that express life and hope, loyalty and devotion, and remembrance respectively.

18. What do funeral homes do?

A well-established, reputable funeral home handles everything from the moment someone passes away to the moment they are buried. Apps such as Sendoff can now obviate the requirement to deal directly with the funeral home however. Services include transporting the body from place of death to the funeral home; dressing and embalming the body; helping with securing certificate of death and other documents like repatriation permits (where necessary); composing the obituary in consultation with the family, obtaining details relating to preferred cemetery or crematory; providing memorial products; organizing the funeral service- including arranging flowers, photos and other memorial pieces; and helping with post-funeral service arrangements.

19. Are funeral homes regulated?

Yes, funeral homes are regulated. The Ministry of Health, the Funeral Industry Regulatory Authority and the Funeral Federation of South Africa all have a role to play in regulating South Africa’s funeral homes. In most other parts of the world, regional authorities regulate funeral homes, with each state or local government overseeing them through established agencies.

20. What is an alternative container?

A green-funeral-inspired alternative container offers an eco-friendly option. Manufacturers typically make it from a non-metal receptacle without ornamentation. This container can be a wood box or fiberboard, making it a more affordable choice than traditional caskets.